Monday, August 18, 2008

I am so lonely for him....

Today I had to take my son back. I miss him already. It is really difficult for me to take him there and leave without him. I just want to grab him and hold him and say NO! I want to say, pack your stuff up and let's go home. However, that is not to be yet. The next stage is the transitional home and that is coming up more rapidly than we had imagined. I am trying to prepare myself for that.

When growing up, the word foster home, in my mind, meant that a child had parents that didn't care for him/her, or were drug abusers, or child abusers. It is such a big pill to swallow as my son will be in a foster home. UGGG!!! Drives me crazy to know that the stereo type probably still applies. For us, that is so far from the truth. We love Taylor. We want everything that is good for Taylor. He is our heart and our soul. I just feel so sad about it in that aspect. However, he is going to a great family in our area and that is good. They are supposed to have a lot of experience with kids and the system. We will be able to see him a lot more.

Thanks all that follow this and everyone that writes comments or sends us email. It helps keep us going.


Casdok said...

I love the photo.

It is so hard saying goodbye.

I do hope the new home is good for Taylor.

Jen said...

What an absolutely beautiful picture.

I hear you- we moved into a new house 3 weeks ago, and my son still won't set foot in it. My longest visit with him in 3 weeks has been sitting on our front porch eating snacks for 10 minutes before he was just too upset to stay- I feel like I'm going insane. I know that he's being well cared for, but I want him here with me.

He hates it when we go to his house as he gets confused about why we're in his "home"...I'm so glad that he feels comfortable there, but he just can't deal with having his family there no matter how much he loves us (and I have no doubt that he does).

It's so hard some days.

Unfortunately a lot of times the stereotypes are true- my son's in a home that has 10 boys, and right now they're in a great place because they have 3/10 sets of parents "involved". It was a real change for them when my son went there almost 5 years ago and I wanted to be involved in his life.

I'm glad that Taylor's going to be closer to you- I hope that it makes it easier.

You're not alone.